So Scotland said no (just), the
North London derby was a dire affair, another Tory chap jumped over to UKIP, Blighty
is back to bombing Iraq and the Lion
King has now overtaken the Phantom of the Opera as the most successful
stage musical of all time (and has actually become the highest-grossing thing
in box office history). And that there ends your short and sharp weekly news
update from me (hire me BBC).
In terms of news from me - I've started a new diploma (and
got 97% in the first assignment), I've started work on the second album (more on
that at a much later date), Matt's
album has started to go live (so check
it out) and I've discovered that I am frankly no good at skittles. But what I
really want to speak about in this post is something that I've mentioned (but
glossed over) in the last few posts - and that is my impending jobless state /
freedom (whichever way you choose to look at it).
With 6 months to go until you are unemployed, how do you feel?
Ok, I'll get to where I'm at right now, but I want to
quickly start by giving you a bit of context (and answering an inevitable
question) about the redundancy situation (because if I'm going to speak about
this whole thing I might as well paint the whole picture). So here we go:
There had been talk of our office closing for a number of
years, but on the 31st March I had a phone call saying that the plan was for
the office to close (on March 31st 2015) and for the work to go to our office
in Solihull (I've spoken more about what I was up to / got up to that day here).
In very simple terms our current office has half of it free, and the building
in Solihull where the rest (of my part) of the company works currently has the
best part of a floor free. So the logic behind the plan is simple (and to
answer the inevitable question) - yes, I completely understand it and if I was
in the decision making shoes I would probably have made the same decision.
Following that, we were all given the option to go and work in Solihull, and in
the last month or so I (alongside loads of others) have decided that I won't be
taking up that option (I've been helped along the way by knowing that my job
doesn't exist in the new structure at Solihull and I would have to go for
something different). So anyway, that's the background with that - but now I
need to answer the real question. How do I feel?
How many truly life changing moments do you think you have
had in your life? How many moments have you experienced where your life has
taken a definite turn after a massive event (planned or unplanned)? The events
of Chapter
9 last year were heart-breaking for Cass and I, and they were a landmark of our time
together, but as far as I can work out our lives haven't taken a change of
direction following that. But March 31st will be one of those change of
direction days for me (and that's not just me building it up). I've spent over
10 years of my life working for this company (which isn't bad considering that
I was only planning on a 6 month stint) and the very simple truth is that I
have no idea where life will take me following that day (apart from hopefully
on a big holiday!). I've got an idea about what I'd like to do, but that's not necessarily
what I'll end up doing (in fact I'm fairly confident that it won't be). But the
really bizarre thing for me is that despite the uncertainty over the future I
feel completely at peace (and I'm not just saying that either). I've been
reading back over past chapters over the last few weeks, and I've now started
to realise that I've been getting mentally prepared for this moment for a while
(see mentions of crossroads
in previous chapters).
So, there you have it - the first part of my answer is that
I'm at peace with the decision I've made (not to push for a job in Solihull)
and I'm calm (and perhaps more worryingly a bit excited) about the future and
what it may hold (cue brief January mini-meltdown). But that is only half of
the 'how I'm feeling' part.......
Now I mentioned that I was only planning on doing a 6 month
stint, yet I've been working for the company for over 10 years and I've
(probably quite naturally) spent some time reflecting over the last few months
on why I didn't do a runner 6 months in and go back to working in music (aside
from the obvious answer that I don't think my liver could / would have coped).
Now don't get me wrong here I enjoy my job (most of the time) and I've been
lucky enough to have done a few different roles in my time with the company and
learnt a fair bit as well. But would my actual job have kept me in the company
for so long? Absolutely not. Next up is pay, and yes I'm paid quite well for
what I do, but those of you who know me know that money is not a major
motivation. What about facilities then? Well one of our toilets has been broken
for at least half of my time in the office (not by me), and whilst we do have a
lake (when it rains) in front of the office it isn't actually meant to be there
and when you couple that with the fact that part of the roof leaks when the AC
is on overdrive I think that facilities is definitely out (and I'm still bitter
about the Northampton office having the bar taken out before we started working
there!). Benefits? I've got a pension that I'm sure I'll be grateful for in
later life and if it hadn't been for the company it's very unlikely that I'd
have even started one by now. So that's all good - but it certainly hasn't kept
me here. Job satisfaction? I've had some good days where I've left and thought
'I'm really satisfied with what I've achieved today' but I've also had some
days (which I'm sure that you can all appreciate) where I've left the office
and have wanted nothing more than to have a meltdown in frustration (which we
would need to be followed by a beer). How about a lack of other options I hear
you say? It might surprise you to know that I actually have had other offers in
my 10 year stretch (and I've gone for other jobs but not got them as well) -
but crucially I haven't come back to my job disappointed from not being offered
something different, and if anything (bar an initial day of slumping) I've
ended up being more motivated. And I still (unless I've just got back from
holiday) don't get the 'bleurgh work tomorrow' feeling. SO WHAT IS IT? And the
answer is without any question - the people.
The very
first cast list in 10 Resolutions featured people that I work with and
throughout the course of the 18 or so months that I've been posting I've lost
track of the number of people from my office that have made the cast list. And
they aren't just random mentions either, these are people that mean so much to
me that they deserve mentioning in the cast lists as they are a major part of
my life. But this goes far beyond just me (although I'm probably the soppy one),
the difference between my office and 99% of the other offices in the country is
that we aren't just colleagues - we are friends. We stand up for one another.
We care for one another. We encourage each other. We have fun together. We
fight for one another and when one of us is hurting we stand alongside them to
help pull them through. We are a community and a family. And I could not be any
prouder to have been part of it.
It has been a blessing and a complete honour to be able to
work in a place with so many amazing people, and I'll be forever thankful that
I've had the chance to spend time with people that have graduated so far beyond
being my colleagues that they are now life-long friends (whether they like it
or not they are stuck with me now......). So this post is for all the people of
GCC, both past and present. Wherever I end up has an impossible act to follow
(and yes I'll inevitably be coming back and reminding myself of my very high
and unrealistic expectations for a new workplace on the 1st April). I have
faith though, after all I was only meant to be at GCC for 6 months and look
what happened. Who knows what could happen next.......
So how
am I feeling about redundancy?
I'm at peace about the future, and want to make the most of
the next few months with my friends at GCC (and yes I could have just answered
that in a sentence - but where would the fun have been in that)
Remember that you can keep in touch with 10 Resolutions on Twitter and Facebook - and please feel free to ask some questions that you'd like to know my thoughts on :)
Speak Soon. Keep Safe. God Bless.
P.S Congratulations to Tommel (Tom
and Mel)
who are now expecting their first little bot! Conversations to call it Andi
however have not started particularly well (I have patience).......
P.P.S Does anyone want to offer me a job? :)
