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Friday, 10 May 2013

A Bieber Free Zone

There was outrage in March when Justin Bieber started his performance two hours late at the 02 in London. Scenes of children crying and angry parents threatening to kidnap Bieber and strand him in Slough dominated the news the next day (Unfortunately media outlets decided that this was a much better story to lead with than something like famine…….).
In response to all of the negative press Bieber decided to apologise stating that his performance was delayed due to “technical issues” (something which would be understandable if the 02 hadn’t already said in response to complaints the night before that “Justin will come out when he is ready”).
Bieber’s next few nights at the 02 happened without a hitch but a quick glance across the news pages suggests that the rest of his world tour has been similarly uneventful……(stories involving Anne Frank, topless airport trips, monkeys, drugs, paparazzi and stun guns are mentioned repeatedly).

2 months later – and this week Bieber has again found himself at the end of fan hatred after starting a performance in Dubai (where the cheapest ticket was £100) over 2 hours late. The following night perhaps in a response to this (or in response simply to the fact that it was Justin Bieber) he was attacked on stage by some form of incredible hulk who managed to overturn a grand piano in his desperation to become the bestest Belieber of them all. The media exploded into a flurry of activity and quickly pictures of his Biebership were all over the news – AGAIN.

Now it shouldn’t take genius to work out that I am not Biebers biggest fan. And actually when I say that – what I really mean is that I am not a fan at all. I have no understanding of how people managed to watch that “Baby” video so many times that it broke some form of the internet. I have no idea who actually likes Justin Bieber. Apparently the younger folk like him – but none of the younger folk that I have spoken to can stick his music – and especially not that “Baby” song.
So – I’m very confused. What I will say though – is that there is clearly something not entirely ship shape going on with him at the moment. Maybe it’s the pressures of fame or the stuff that comes along with it? Maybe it’s the pressures of trying to write a follow up to a song which constantly repeats the same 4 words in a chorus or trying to face off in a music market with a chap called Psy. So if there is something wrong with him – I do hope that he realises and recovers. I don’t want any harm to come to him – whether through illness or that he has brought upon himself (if he happens to recover without the ability to record any more music EVER though – that would be a bonus and could possibly help in some way refocus the world on things we should be worrying about). If however he is just being a brat and not appearing on stage because he can’t be arsed – and acting like a diva because he thinks he is better than everyone else – then any form of sympathy I have for him has gone.
Despite everything else – it shows a massive disrespect for the fans (and don’t get me started on punctuality.............)

HOWEVER – Parents, much as I sympathise with the ordeal that you must have gone through – waiting for him to turn up and then being delayed (I’d imagine it would end up like just wanting to rip a plaster off) and them him not turning up till much later meaning that your sproglets were going to be tired for school the next day or that you were all going to miss the last train home.....As much as I do sympathise with that (and as much as I understand that you want to treat your children to stuff)  – I feel that that I need to ask what you were expecting given his reputation? I’m also intrigued to know how you think he sets a good example to your little bots? (but I guess that’s a question for another day....) I’m also thinking that perhaps this is good opportunity for you to jump on their Bieber disappointment and to introduce them to some good music along the way......

Parents however – please don’t feel bad – because there is a group of people that I haven’t addressed in this rant. And they are the 15 – ** year olds that went to see Biebersaurus because of his “excellent” music or because “he’s so pretty”. They went to see him out of choice. If you are a member of this group then you need to take a long hard look at what you are doing to this world. Just think – if you stopped buying his music and his merch and his concert tickets – then you would be saving him from the pressures of fame. Wouldn’t you like to be the one that saved the Bieberface? If you are in this group and you did miss your train after the concert – I hope you used the time to reflect on your behaviour.

Anyway...I shall leave you with this from the Last Leg....just about sums up everything really..... - oh and Terry has told me to say hi to you all...


10 Resolutions will return with a full chapter next week so please send your questions in about life, the universe (but not his Bieberness) and everything in between in via the facebook page, via twitter, by emailing or through prophetic dance. Right – I’m off to prep for some karaoke....and I’m willing to bet that on reading this someone rather unfunny is going to request THAT song. I’ll let you know my reaction next week.

God Bless.

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